There.
I've said it.
I'm drowning.
Drowning in a hundred things that need to be done RIGHT NOW!
And hiding from a fist full of things that should have been done a long time ago.
In a couple of weeks we are going away. This is a good thing. Really it is!
Every year we go to a fantastic games convention called ConCeption (yes, I know. I didn't name it!) We have been going since it started - this is our 14th year. It is a place of happy memories, familiar enough to feel like "Home" and full of friends.
The children are so far beyond excited it's scary. In September M began asking how long it was until we went away. Even the fact that Christmas was before ConCeption didn't stop the holiday being their focus.
I kinda feel sorry for a dear friend - S - who has been told about the event in detail every time we have seen her for months now!
So why am I drowning? Well, this is a games convention, there will be much playing of role playing games there (as well as card and board / boxed games.) And each year I run some children's games. This year is no exception - I am scheduled to run two kids games, and one game for my brother in law (the infamous Uncle N who always comes with us.)
And therein lies the problem. None of the games are written - one is very almost done. Needs proof reading and a tiny bit of character creation. The game for N I have no ideas for at all. And the final game - a Pirate LRP - I have ideas for, but they are refusing to line up and be sensible.
The main issue is that my creativity drains away when I am tired, and right now I am exhausted. M is back to regular night terrors (though usually very short ones), and I am feeling run down :(
Add to that some organisational stress at Church (where I co-ordinate Junior church, no where near as grand / impressive as it sounds!), a bit of family stress, reorganising the kitchen as we have run out of work space (new microwave taking up too much room), a bookshelf needing drastic repairs, having to sort and archive home ed stuff, storing things in the loft - which then needed a bit of reorganising and The Letter, and that's why I'm drowning. Too many balls in the air, and not one I can easily afford to drop.
Oh, The Letter? Didn't I mention? We got the report of J's last assessment, and it is full of factual errors. We need to write correcting it - it's really that bad. It says he had surgery to have grommets fitted - his hearing has always been 100%. No surgery needed. Some problems I listed have been minimised and trivialised, and others have been left out entirely. The conclusions given look very much like a dismissal of our major concerns, even if they have agreed to further assessments. The report made me feel really angry - like I had been to a different meeting than the person who wrote it - and I am struggling to work out how to phrase things politely but firmly. We need these people to listen to us, not write off our worries. I think I have written a dozen letters in my head, but none that really fit the requirements.
I am determined that I will get it all done in time, and if I don't it won't be through lack of trying!
But I am starting to worry now.
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